The Dream Shaper
by Wild Nature
Summary: A young girl is plagued is it the world against her or is it her against herself? Awaken Sailor Morpheus and her eyes will reveal the truth of herself.
1. Chapter 1

The Dream Shaper Chapter One: Welcome to MY Nightmare

"I can't sleep anymore. I can't think, I can't feel. I'm trapped in this self that I can't understand. I just don't know what I AM anymore!"

"I mean, I used to know but every since that time... that time... so long.. ago..."

"What time, Musouka?" Aisei-sensei asked quietly. An elderly man with an outstanding degree, he worked at the psychiatric ward, his current patient being a young girl of fifteen.

By all rights, she was fine physically but everyone said that her mental capacities were failing. The doctor was not so sure of that. He knew there were secrets she would not spill so he gently guided her to at least talk some way about whatever was bothering her.

"Time? Did I say time?" She laughed nervously. She paced and looked out of the window at the high setting of the sun. Midday and yet she was trapped in a white room where she wanted to spill everything.

But there was no way in hell she could do that. Oh no, one word of what went through her head and they'd lock her up for good.

"Yes. You were saying that you were trapped because of some incident.." He trailed off, waiting for her reply.

She turned and faced a mirror. Her face was pale. It used to be a normal healthy glow of peach. Her eyes were still blue but now seemed dull. Her sky blue hair was even messy. It was cropped unevenly. She cut it herself when she had a nightmare that her hair was strangling her.

She reached out slowly and her fingers lightly tapped that mirror. She half expected to be sucked into that reflection. She saw it but she felt as if it were mocking her, saying it wasn't her, it would never be her.

"Musouka?" The doctor broke into her thoughts gently.

"I...what were we talking about?" She looked honestly confused.

He sighed a bit reluctantly. "Our time's up for today. See you on Friday?"

"Yea... sure..." She looked back at the mirror again and felt relief as she realized that it WAS her in the reflection.

As she left the building, she hurriedly snuck behind a bush and fiddled around in her pocket. Just to her side was a vending machine.

And she just had to get her chocolate fix today. She hummed as she put the money in and pressed F1 to obtain a chocolate bar. She watched it sag with glee, about to fall.

And then it froze in the air and her smile faded.

"Hey.." She began. "HEY! Give me my bar! GIVE ME GIMME GIMME!" She kicked at it with relish, her emotions welling up until she broke into sobs. "I just wanna freakin' candy bar!"

"Relax, relax," A girl appeared from the side, with blue hair and blue eyes. She smiled at the other, despite the frazzled look and added more money and pushed the same button.

It caused two candy bars to fall and Musouka's eyes widened in glee once more.

"Here," The other girl handed her both. "I don't eat much chocolate. Have a nice day," She waved as she began to walk off.

But Musouka's hands slowly fisted around the candy bar and she hurriedly reached the other girl.

"Please! Take it as a token of my appreciation!" She smiled weakly. "Please?"

The other was quiet before smiling. "Sure, why not?"

And she again left as Musouka watched her. Once completely gone, she tore into the candy like it was precious water and began stuffing into her face.

"Musouka?" Helen Seiseino was a English professor at a nearby high school. Thankfully, it wasn't the one her daughter went to but Mosouka made sure never to bring that up to her mother. Helen arched an eyebrow. "What did I tell you about candy?"

Musouka mumbled something.

"That's right! Too much is unhealthy. You promised you watched your intact."

"It's been a day," Musouka began.

"Yes but still. You're agitated enough already, you don't need sugar," Her mother smiled sympathizing.

"Mother, I do not have ADD!" Mosouka began.

"I know, I know," Helen held up her hands in defense. "Before we head home, go clean your face."

Musouka sighed noisily. "Blah, blah, blah.."

She entered the restroom and quickly washed her face. She looked up at the reflecting mirror and stared at it until her eyes dulled out.

She must of passed out because she awoke, her mother over her worriedly. "Honey! What happened?"

"My.. head hurts.." Musouka struggled up, her mother aiding her with a shoulder to lean on.

"Another fainting spell. Damn it! I thought the medication would be helping."

"It's been happening less and less, Mom. Don't worry," Musouka smiled at her mother.

And her mother tried to smile back but worry and fear was hard to shed.

She entered the school a few feet and promptly turned around and left once more. She'd been doing this for the past half hour now and school was going to be starting soon. Others passed her, glancing at her with strange looks.

She ignored them and tried to think positively.

'My shadow's trying to get me...' A voice said. It was her voice but why the hell would she be thinking like this! It was like her nightmares, trying to brainwash her to think that everything was going to kill her or something.

"Come on, Musouka! It's time to hit the books!" She told herself.

'Or have them crash down on you.'

"DAMNIT!" This drew a lot of people's attention and she spotted a teacher weaving in toward her. She let out a animalistic hiss before disappearing into the building, walking rapidly. She made it a point to never run so she looked pretty damn foolish with her elongated steps.

She sighed as she found her locker in moments. She fiddled with the lock and with a decisive snap, it flung itself open as she felt shadows reach out and grasp her.

And of course, with her terrifying screams, she drew plenty of more attention. By the time she realized that it was all in her head, everyone had backed off a good twenty feet, staring at her like she was crazy.

"I'm not crazy!" She shouted at them before looking back at the locker. She lay in a huddle, unable to move.

So someone else did for her. A young blonde with a red bow plucked the few books in the rather dusty locker and put them in the discarded bag before she walked over to Musouka.

And Musouka noted the light airy step the other had, as if she were a angel who floated. That was her thought.

"Here, these are the books you were looking for right?" She smiled at the other girl. They were the same height but the other was more muscled.

Musouka didn't look up. "Thanks..." Her voice came out strained but not flat like it usually did when she tried to be nice to people.

"So where's your class?" The other asked. The other students were breaking off but a teacher approached.

"Someone was screaming," The teacher began.

"She saw a spider or something," the other girl waved her hand idly.

"Huh? Well, you are all right?" The teacher knelt down to Musouka's level.

'Yea, right. If I answered that one the way I WANTED to...'

"I'm fine," her voice was listless. "I just.. jumped, that's all."

"All right then. Head to class you two," And he turned smartly with a curt nod to the two girls.

"So what class are you in?"

"I'm in... 3 - A."

"Really?" The blue eyed blonde angel smiled. "That's my class! Come on, I'll be your tour!"

"Oh but.." But the girl grabbed her hand and tugged her up effortlessly.

"My name is Aino Minako," the blonde introduced herself.

"I'm Seiseino Musouka."

"Huh? Really, you don't look completely Japanese," Minako pointed out.

"I'm half. My mother's English."

"Really! What's that like?"

"Like I have a mom that's English! What'd you think it'd be like?" Musouka snapped.

"Sorry, sorry. Anyways, here's our class!"

And Musouka dutifully followed the rather boisterous girl, despite the misgivings that the girl was far too happy and rather floaty.

Musouka sat in the back with Minako a seat ahead. She lost interest fast and was gazing out of the window, her mind wonderfully blank. But she felt like she was living somewhere out there, in some place that she longed so much to escape to.

It was full of life, of dragons and magic and people who spoke in song. It was a fantasy but she went to it often as if it were her own real world.

Which was where she was as Minako poked her arm. Minako, not getting an answer, moved the poking to the head and accidentally poked Musouka's eye out.

"OWIEE!" Musouka blinked, rubbing her smarting eye as she glared at the other girl.

"Class is over. We can go home... Where'd you go off to?" Minako asked interested.

"No where. I'm always here!" She grumbled, trying to stand up. But she was struck by a dizzy spell and crashed forward. The desk was spilled with her and something shot out, glittering brightly before disappearing into a shadow.

"Here," Minako helped her up before turning to get whatever had been danced away. She found it, a gold band with a white diamond on its top. It was etched with lining along it's edges.

"Hey, is this.. like an engagement ring?" Minako breathed.

"WHAT?" Musouka was breaking from her spell and was stuffing her bag with her fallen items. She was distracted but she didn't much care anyways what Minako was saying.

"Is this a engagement ring?" Minako repeated.

"No, it's not!" Musouka held out her hand, her face set in stone.

Minako blinked before carefully handing it back.

Musouka placed the ring on her left thumb.

"Uh.. that's the wrong finger.." She began halfheartedly.

"It fits my thumb only," Musouka shrugged.

They walked quietly out and down the hall. Musouka eyed the shadows at the side and sighed slightly as they exited, seeing the sunlight shatter the black figures into gray lines.

"Well, it was nice hanging out," Minako began.

"Yea...nice. Look, don't force yourself to like me or 'hang out' with me. I'm fine on my own. So yea, just wanted to say that. See ya."

She turned on her heels and trudged to the bus.

She sat down quietly on the empty bench. She fiddled with the ring before placing it up high to admire the rainbow effects splay over her outfit.

She sighed tiredly. "Just where am I going? I can't even think straight anymore.."

She rubbed her eyes and winced, her eye socket still sore from Minako's persistent poking. "I should've yelled at her.."

The bus rolled in and she got on, her attention withdrawn within her. She was unaware of people who looked almost like her. Pale faces, dull eyes, and hunched bodies that seemed to be draining of energy.

They all had their eyes closed.

The bus door slowly closed but it let out a echoing clack and she jumped, her eyes flying open. And she realized that there was a very strange problem.

"Head on back, girlie," The bus driver crackled before throwing the bus into full throttle. She was thrown backwards with a scream and found the ceiling glowing with strange flickering lights that bore down on her. She began to feel heavy and her body snapped, collapsing.

'Oh...'

'Sleeping on the job?' It was like her voice but tinted in colors.

'Baku..'

'Here and ready. Wanna get up now?'

'My body..'

'Wake up, woman!' Baku's voice was laughing.

She felt it, a wisp sucking around her, soothing her jangled nerves. 'We need to save them. If they sleep just a little more, they will not wake up. You must wake up for them..'

'Fine! Fine...'

"Fine..." Her eyes fluttered open as the bus came to a throbbing halt. She spotted a set of three girls, one of them being of that blue haired one from the hospital. "Better make this quick," She grunted as she fisted her hand with the ring.

"Morpheus! Awaken me!" She called out as she curled into a ball of light. She then slowly stretched as if awakening and opened her eyes, the light fading out to reveal her fuku.

She had no tiara but a gold crescent moon facing the right. Her earrings were studded three times, the bottom a rectangular link, the middle a round loop, and the second a round stud, all of them yellow. Her choker was gold with a dangling sky blue orb. At each side and attached to the bottom edge were two more round orbs. These orbs were attached to the dangling orb with black thread. The dangling orb had three consecutive orbs, getting smaller the further down.

Her collar was sky blue with a gold edge and a gold stripe going across just before the point into the brooch and a gold stripe just a few inches from the back edge. Her bodice was white with wing like shoulders, not unlike Saturn but these pointed downward. The bodice was divided at the breasts and along the curves of her front body was a divider as well. The brooch was blue with a gold outline and the bow was like a gold shoe lace but the tails were tassels instead.

The waistband was a gold belt. At its center was blue rectangle that had a blue gem in its center, this gem outlined in gold. The skirt was jeans with three levels. The top was sky blue, the secondary blue, and the bottom was white. At the sides of the belt were two jean strands of blue that hooked around her hips to the back of the belt. Her back bow were merely blue tassels, clasped at each end with a gold orb, the tufts puffing out a inch or so.

She wore sky blue hand gloves but the fingers were cut off. Her boots were a few inches above her ankles and sky blue. They looked pretty heavyset and they had a good two inch heel. At each ankle was a gold band. At each side of the band was a ring that dangled three threads that attached to the back of her ankles with another ring.

"Hoee!" She jumped headfirst at the driver with a squeal.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!" The lady screamed, her face contorting into that of a grotesque monster.

"I'm going to end this nightmare!" She reached around and stomped her foot onto the gas pedal.

The three girls all jumped back as the bus lurched and then came to a crash at a pole.

"Not my best but hey..." Mosouka shrugged.

"YOU LITTLE!" A wretched hand grasped Mosouka's throat before throwing her back out just in time with the door swinging open. The monster slinked out, its tongue lashing out. "Should've fallen asleep!"

"Ha! As the soldier of dreams, I am the Dream Shaper, Sailor Morpheus! I'm turning this into your nightmare, you monster!"

"HA!" It struck out, its claws elongating to plaster the senshi to the wall. "Now, let's see what kind of nightmares you hold?" It smiled, the smirk stretching it's already strained features.

"Hey! How dare you attack some innocent girl!" Sailor Moon, followed by Sailor Mercury and Sailor Jupiter. "I am the pretty suited sailor soldier, Sailor Moon! In the name of the moon, you're punished!"

"Hey! Get me down!" Morpheus shouted.

"HA!" It re-grew its claws, destroying the cement as cracks and debris appeared as it attacked. The girls easily dodged.

"Jupiter Thunder Dragon!"

"Mercury Shabon Spray!"

The two girls attacked and easily blasted the monster back, hard. It rammed into the bus and Morpheus winced.

"Carefully! There are a bunch of sleeping idiots on that bus!" She called out.

Sailor Moon reached her in a few gallops and tugged on the digging claws. "Say, are you a senshi?"

"Give a point to the kid! OF COURSE I AM! I got the freakin' collar, don't I!"

Sailor Moon heaved and Morpheus collapsed, feeling lightheaded. "Aye... This just isn't what I was meant to do!"

The monster reared up. "You cannot ..."

"Defeat me! Yea, we heard it all before!" Morpheus pressed her hands outward. "Morpheus Nightmarish Hold!" Black holes sucked outward, clamping around the monster. In seconds, it began to scream in terror. "Somebody do a final hit!"

"Moon Princess Halation!" Sailor Moon called out and the light was engulfed in the shadows before tearing it apart, the monster turning to dust.

"Great! Now for the sleepers!" Morpheus pranced up as she held up her hand. It was wisp, barely there as she called out. "Baku, Devour!"

It shot up and outward, swirling over the people until it ran out of others to wake up. It shot back to her before dispersing into thin air with a sound akin to a belch.

"What the hell was that?" Jupiter demanded.

"Uh...Bye!" And she turned and took off running.

She turned a corner, her body straining. "RUNNING! I hate running!" She untransformed and sighed, exhaustion spilling out.

Then her head snapped up. "Oh shit! I forgot my bookbag!" She turned and hurried back, this time making sure she wasn't running.

"My bag, my bag.." She turned to enter the bus but people began piling out, squashing her backwards as she grumbled.

"Can't breath..." She shoved past the last stragglers and found her bag hidden under the bench. She picked it up and shook of whatever dirt had fallen on it. "Phew.." She looked around, the bus now emptied.

She left the bus and came face to face with the three girls. "Yes?"

"I guess this bus is out of commission," Usagi was sad. She didn't want to walk ALL the way home.

"It's good for you. Besides, your legs are rather puny."

"Hey!" Usagi frowned.

"Yea, well, whatever," She threw her bag over her shoulder and turned to crash into a body. "What is this? Problem day?"

"Mamo-chan! Could you give me a ride home?" Usagi was heard asking as the other girls smiled charmingly at the man who could drive.

"Bleh..." But she peeked back and smiled as the man held his girl close to him. She was giggling and pressing herself happily to him, talking about food or something.

"They're a cute couple...Too bad they're not like superheroes! That'd be so much more romantic!" Mosouka sighed happily. "Well, gotta get home..."

Mosouka, once home, felt the well of exhaustion tear to pieces. But there was a very loud and annoying noise just inside her room.

"And behind door number one is..."

It flung open as a large, dark pink blob stomped out. This strange, bizarre creature of strangeness, with it's flat pushed up nose, it's wide black, beady eyes, and ears that couldn't decide to flop forward or stay upright and it's belly, low hanging due to both short limbs and well, natural fatness.

"You're a pig," Mosouka climbed over the pig with a grin.

"Can't think of any originality to that point?" the pig grunted.

"It's a classic!"

"What happened?"

"Well, Baku, you were there."

"Temporarily. Who were those other senshi?"

"Senshi?"

"People like you! People LIKE YOU!"

"There's no one like me! I go the ward at least once every three months."

Baku stubbly marched over to the overly large set of two pillows, perfectly fixed to keep the cute piggy comfortable. "You're fine! You just need to relax more!"

"Uh huh?" She was fiddling with the wall, just behind the front of the bedpost.

"And candy doesn't help!" Baku sounded exasperated as Mosouka singled out a bag of M&M's.

"Yum!" She was about to pop a handful in her mouth when a shadow passed over her.

Her father, Ryuu, blinked. "I see you've been using your allowance as school," He said dryly.

Mosouka silently held the candy out.  
"I'm not going to take it. It's your responsibility to spend the money your way and if you want to waste it.."

"I save half of my allowance!" Mosouka bit out.

"Anyways, Baku has been causing some trouble around the yard. Not what he's doing but the fact that everyone else is freaked out that we have a pig.."

"Don't make me get rid of him!" Mosouka wailed.

"I'm not! He's very well behaved for a pig and he doesn't eat as much either. And besides, you two seem to get along so well. As if you could understand each other," Ryuu knelt down and patted Baku's head.

"So..uh.. why'd you come in?"

"Your doctor said that we should interact more. Apparently, he thinks you're locked inside yourself and you need to interact with others more."

"Well... I made a new friend today.." She lied. She thought it was merely a white lie and they could've been friends, if she weren't such a bitch. But she kept quiet about that last note.

"That's great! Invite your friend to dinner! Say Friday!"

"Uhh.. she might be busy..."

"With what? We'll cook us up storm! This will make your mother very happy."

'The mother card...I HATE that rouge!' She thought, grumbling. She watched her father leave after a quick kiss to the forehead.

"Well, well, well.." Baku smirked. "I didn't know THIS."

"I can't invite her over. I completely dissed her!"

"WHAT FOR?"

"SHUUU!" She grasped the snout and flinched. "You're drooling! EWWW!" She shook her hand viciously. "Disinfectant! I need disinfectant!"

"I'm not poisonous," he began.

"EW! EW! EWWWIEEE!"

Baku sighed as he plopped down on the bed. He squinted his eyes at her before falling asleep.

She took a few minutes washing both hands before she sighed. She struggled to NOT look at the mirror. It always bothered her. She wiped her hands and left the bathroom and went downstairs. She stared at the door and for a moment, could imagine it as a prison door.

"Trapped... where am I trapped!" She took a breathe but found it gasping. She held her hands to her chest and began to heave. She couldn't breathe, her body kneeling forward till she crashed.

'You're doing it again...' Baku's voice echoed. She saw him as a it, floating as a wisp.

'Why this form?' She asked suddenly and realized she was floating upside down in the blackness.

'This is who I am.. I can change if you like...'

'Last time you did that, you became me! I can't even look in the mirror because of you!'

'I'm a shape shifter. I could be anything..'

'Could you be a guy?'

'I repeat, you're doing it again.'

'DOING WHAT?' She felt desperate. 'Come on! Wake me up!'

'I can't always do this for you! You need to wake up on your own account. You want to be trapped here!'

'What kind of GUIDE are you! Lazy little...'

'Piggy?' His voice was laughing. It sounded almost like hers but it was fluid, filtering through her.

'WAKE ME UP WAKE ME UP WAKE ME WAKE ME WAKE!'

She jerked up on the couch and heard voices, loud angry tones of her parents.

"She says she getting better but she keeps fainting! Maybe a lack of iron?"

"Hell, it could be neurological!" Her father sounded so tired. In fact, both of them did.

"Why do I have such problems?" She lay back on the couch, trying to think clearly but her eyes fluttered closed as she fell into a restless sleep.

"Okay! Today I'll be nice! I'll be sweet! I'll beg for forgiveness from Aino-san!"

"Hi Mosou-chan!" Minako came barreling in and clapped the other girl's shoulders. "How are you today?"

"I...uh, fine, fine. And you?"

"Great! I heard Sailor Moon had another battle!" Minako stagewhispered.

'Is she on to me?'

"Too bad Venus wasn't there! She'd have kicked ass!" Minako bragged.

'Oh dear god! Is she...'

"Oh god! Look at me going on! As if I could ever get to know them! They're much too cool."

'Phew...'

"So..uh, you're not like mad at me?"

"For what?" The look of total clueless was intriguing to Mosouka.

"Err.. great.. uh, say, you busy on Friday?"

"Let's see.." Minako pressed her finger to her cheek thoughtfully. "I suppose I don't have any plans. No date, no life... Yep! I'm free!" Minako grinned.

"Err, great. Want to have dinner at my place?"

"This isn't like a set up, right?"

"What's a set up?" Mosouka was so intent on hearing a yes or no, she wasn't paying attention to questions.

"Sure, I'd like to go!" Minako smiled. "Um.. you seem.. to have trouble... err..."

"I don't have ADD!" She snapped before flushing. "I mean, I just lose my trail of thoughts, that's all."

"Oh... Well, let's head to class, okay?"

And they did, all the while Mosouka watched the other girl's shadows intently.

'Funny, it's just a shadow... not like the others...' 


	2. Chapter 2

The Dream Shaper Chapter Two: Say Hello to My Piggy

"WHAT AM I GOING TO DO!?" Musouka raged to Baku. He was slumped over on his back, his light pink belly shiny in the artificial light of her room. "I completely forgot I had a session!"

She was pacing, the rug wearing thin as she turned and tossed in her steps.

"What did your parents say?" Baku grunted, flipping over with difficulty. He snorted and shook his head. "Aye, got anything to eat?"

"I'M BUSY!"

"Yea, yea. Well, what did your par..."

"I heard you the first time! They expect me to bring her right over!"

"Can't you eat before going?"

"No..." She drew that out in a very vexed, annoying tone. "Because my appointment is right after school. Or do you forget?"

"I'm not the one who can't think straight."

"AUGH!!!" She resumed her pacing. She bit her thumbnail before going for the skin. She gnawed nervously as she tried to think rationally. "She'll think I'm a quack!"

"I'm surprised she didn't think like that in the beginning."

Musouka came to slow halt. "I'm going to make you into BACON IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP!"

He rolled over, his back toward her. But she heard the wafting chuckle and her eyes gleamed white.

"Musouka?" Helen opened the door, holding a rather large bowl of fruits, vegetables and oats. "Hey, Baku!" She smiled as she patted the pig's bottom. "Got you some supper! Are you hungry?"

Baku's little curled tail seemed to wag as he began to chow down. Helen watched for a moment before smiling at her daughter. "I'm so happy you have a friend coming over. I'm sure she won't mind going to the appointment either. It's quite natural to..."

'No, no, and did I mention, NO! She'll think I'm a crazy!"

"If she agreed to come over.." Helen began.

"So I can't let her see that I go see some shrink!"

"Be rational. There are many other stable people who see 'shrinks'. They help you keep on track. She would be very understanding," Helen hugged her daughter who merely grumbled, hiding her face to the floor. "Now, why not get on to doing your homework?"

She watched her mother leave. "They won't stop bothering me," She told Baku. His mouth was full as his chewed material nearly spilled out. "And I don't need to watch you eat..."

She sighed as she settled down to fiddle with her homework.

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"So, where are we going?" Minako asked brightly. She was following Musouka to her therapy session.

"Uh.. I go to this place for a hour twice a week. I ... talk to someone..."

"Oh.. So like what kind of person do you talk to?"

'How dimwitted is she?!'

"A shrink," Musouka said through gritted teeth. "A s-h-r-i-n-k."

"Oh.. why?"

"Do ever wonder why you continuously ask questions?" Musouka said, her voice strained. "There are points where you SHOULD stop asking."

"Oh...okay."

Musouka inwardly sighed.

"So why do you see a shrink?"

"Now, see. I was dropping you a hint to STOP! I really don't like explaining myself and so your incessant questions..." But the wide-eyed blue eyes stopped Musouka from finishing. "Because I'm having some problems, okay? Just things I can't fix on my own."

"I'm sorry. You know, my friend's boyfriend and one of my best friends are going to be great doctors. You should talk to them."

"Do you even know what a shrink is?"

"One of those doctors you talk to and they take notes and give you medicine."

"Yeah but they're also scratching posts."

Minako was quiet before she realized it was a joke. She began to laugh, rather happily and Musouka blinked, surprised.

"It was THAT funny?" Musouka asked albeit shyly.

"Of course, Musou-chan!"

"Uh..."

"Oh...I'm sorry. You don't like the nickname? What about Yume?"

"YUME? Why that?"

"You're always dreaming."

"I'm not... okay, well, yea, I am but it's not always DREAMS. Sometimes it's like a... a...uh.."

"Nightmare?" Minako tilted her head. "I don't get those that often anymore. I grew out of them."

"Yea, well, I grew into them," Musouka set to grumbling once more.

She led Minako to a waiting room. "I'll be as quick as possible," she promised.

"Take your time!" Minako smiled brightly.

"Happy person, very happy... too happy..ugh..."

Aisei-sensei smiled as Musouka walked in. "How are you today?"

"A hurry. Got a friend waiting for me."

"Ah, you mean Baku?"

"Baku is MY PIG, doctor," Musouka said through gritted teeth.

"I'm sorry. I forgot about that. So tell me about your friend."

She stared at him. "You think it's imaginary."

"You tend to be daydreamer, Musouka," Aisei-sensei gently told her.

"She's in the waiting room for crying out loud!" Musouka shouted.

He blinked and realized she WAS telling the truth. "I'm sorry. So how was your week?"

She slouched on the couch and glared at him.

"Now, we can sit here and pout..." He began.

"Fine by me."

"What about a word association game?"

She said nothing.

"A drawing?"

She sighed. "Fine, a crummy picture it is."

"I want you to draw me...let's see, a bad memory of yours."

"Bad? Memories? I don't.." But he gave her a pen and she began to etch out a picture.

It started with a box. She made lines down inside it and hurriedly colored them to represent bars. She drew a faceless person inside it and added chains that swam out of the box and out of the paper. She drew white wisps, cloudlike things, around her and put scary faces on them. She then began to color in the background, pitch black.

"So.. ahem..." Musouka looked up at the doctor who was looking at the picture with a strange look on his face. "What memory is this?"

"Memory...it's more like a nightmare...I don't know where it came from."

"Is that you?" He pointed to the faceless person.

"I don't know. I don't think so..." She trailed off. She didn't want to talk anymore.

"And these? Are these monsters?"

"They're dead..."

He blinked. "What?"

Musouka suddenly began to tear the picture to pieces. "Shut up! Shut up! I know this isn't real! It's not normal!"

She stared at the broken slivers of paper, her breath caught in her chest.

"Musouka..." The doctor reached out slowly.

The doctor's hand was darkening, becoming stone in her vision. She could feel the cold surface pressing against her and the stone began to climb over her, trying to claim her.

She wasn't aware that she was screaming until there was nothing but complete and utter silence. She was staring at the doctor, the room too white and her eyes widened. His shadow was pressed against the wall, looming higher over him.

"Do..doctor.. your...your.." He turned around and the shadow was back to normal.

"I think that's enough for today. Now.. you could stay the night if you'd like..." He began carefully.

"NO!" She felt the sound escape, the desperation wrapping around her like a tightening vise.

"All right, all right. You'll come by on Monday?"

"Unh huh..." She inched toward the door, her eyes untrusting on that shadow. But it remained on the floor as she fled.

"He..hey.." She panted as she spotted Minako reading a magazine.

"Hey! How was it?" Minako looked worried at the pale face.

"I'm fine. Feeling better by the hour.." She gestured toward the door. "Please... let's go."

They exited and Musouka looked around with an impatient look. A car honked a few cars down and she turned toward it.

"Hey Mom!" She called out as her mother pulled in. "How was work?" She forced herself to make conversation.

"Why honey! Introduce me to your friend first!" Helen exited the car and came to the two girls' side.

"Mom, this is Aino Minako. Ai.. Minako-san, this is my mother, Helen Seiseino."

"So you're American right?"

"Yep! Fell in love with the culture and my husband!" Helen beamed.

"Ah, love is so romantic," Minako sighed. Helen laughed as she gestured for the two to get into the car.

"Now... uh, just to warn you. We have a pet.." Musouka said carefully.

"Really? I have a cat named Artemis."

"Well, um... we have a pig."

Minako smirked and bit in a laugh.

"I'm not joking! His name is Baku," Musouka was looking outside and failed to see the raising of eyebrows.

"Baku...So, why'd you name it that?"

"Huh?"

"Oh, it was very sweet!" Helen broke in. "One day, Musouka had fainted and when we found her, she was being tended to by this little piglet. He was adorable! As if he were taking her nightmares away..."

"Uh... Mom, could you just drive?"

Helen blinked. "Now, honey, that's not the kind of tone you should take with your elders," She began.

"I'm sorry, okay!?"

Helen continued to drive, her eyes clear but blank.

Minako leaned over. "I have trouble with my mother. She thinks I don't apply myself."

"I get that sometimes but it's not in schoolwork, it's in life generally," Musouka grinned.

Musouka sighed as they reached the house. So far, she'd acted pretty normal. Maybe that session had drained out her behavior problems for the day at least. Or so she hoped.

"We're home!" Helen called out. Ryuu poked his head out.

"Dinner's about done. I was making Baku some treats."

"You didn't have to.." Musouka began.

"Don't worry! We know you take good care of him! But he deserves treats every so often! Hello, miss, I'm Ryuu Seiseino, obviously her father."

"Aino Minako," She shook his free hand, the other holding a spatula.

"Go on and show her your room and your.. ahem, little fun toy," He winked at Musouka.

"Baku is not a toy," She mumbled as she went down the hallway. She came to her room and pressed it open.

"Wow! It's really pretty!" The room itself was dark colored, with darkening curtains and dark blue bedding. The carpet was the only light thing, being white.

And in the corner was her little buddy.

"Awwww!!" Minako giggled. "He's a lot more cuter than I thought."

"Yea, he keeps his figure, now don't he?" She reached down and patted his bottom before gently tugging his tail. He cracked an eye open before snuggling back to the ground.

She frowned and tried lifting him.

"You..you don't have to," Minako was heard protesting. But Musouka placed the pig down after a moment and he settled into a sitting position, facing the two girls.

"There! Now you see why he's super cute, right?" Musouka grinned. "It's the flat nose!"

"Actually, I was going by the tail."

"Yea, that's always a favorite."

Baku didn't like them talking about him, especially if he were in the room. He staggered off, giving a very cute oink that the girls ohhed and ahhed over.

Dinner went without a hitch. Musouka felt, for once, at peace of mind. She was even laughing along with the others. It was after dinner when Minako asked her if she wanted to go see some friends at a arcade.

"You meet this late?" Musouka looked out and realized that the sun was still up.

"It's only six! Come on! We'll have fun!"

Musouka sighed and went to get some money but found her mother holding out a twenty. "Keep the change, honey!"

"Yea.. thanks," She pocketed it and followed Minako down the street. They took a bus and found the Crown arcade.

"I go here often. There's a really cute guy working here. His name is Motoki!"

"That's nice."

"Minako!" A group of girls appeared. Again, Musouka faced the blue haired, blue-eyed girl.

"We just keep meeting, don't we?" Musouka said with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, it must be fate," she agreed.

"Guys, this is Seiseino Musouka. She's new to my school."

"Well, actually, I've been going there since well, I entered at the beginning," Musouka raised her other eyebrows, looking rather funny. "You just assumed I was new."

"Oh...I'm sorry. I guess you kind of blend in."

"Not anymore," Musouka mumbled.

The raven with violet eyes frowned. "What?"

"Nothing...Nothing, okay."

"Anyways! This is Tsukino Usagi."

"A rabbit, great."

"And.. this is Kino Makoto."

"So are you, like, the bully of the group?"

"Musouka!" Minako hissed.

"Sorry, I tend to just open my mouth and make me a bitch.."

The others raised an eyebrow at her.

"And this is Mizuno Ami," Minako hurried the introduction.

"Got no problem with her. She got me candy!"

"And this is Hino Rei," Minako sounded very tired.

"The raven! You've got nice hair," Musouka looked around. "So that cute guy you mentioned, where would he be?"

"He's in the back. His family owns this place."

"That's nice..." Musouka wandered off.

"Where'd you find her?" Rei hissed once Musouka was out of hearing range. "She's a.. a.. nut!"

"No she's not. She's just 'out there'," Minako splayed her hands upward and outward to demonstrate 'out there'.

"I don't know, she seems kind of ...well, spastic?" Makoto suggested.

"Woheee!" The five jumped as Musouka ran down a enemy. She was playing a favorite game, the Sailor V battle scene kind. "Kill him! Kill him!"

The others looked toward Minako. "Did I mention she has a pig? It's called Baku."

"Probably nothing," Ami began.

"Now, hold on," Rei began. "She is giving strange vibes!"

"Oh, you say that about everyone!" Usagi retorted.

"I do not!"

"DO SO!"

"DO NOT!"

Musouka, meanwhile, stared at the game, specifically the Sailor V character. It irked her for some reason.

"It's staring at me.. what'd I do?" She had stopped playing and watched in shock as the Sailor V was blown to bits. She screamed instantly, as if she had taken the hits herself. "NO! NO! NO!!"

"Musouka!" A hand clasped her shoulder and she saw the sign 'GAME OVER' flashing over the screen. "What happened?"

"She was blown to bits..." Musouka gulped. "I didn't think this game was violent!"

"Sailor V doesn't get blown up! The monsters do but..." Minako began.

And Musouka realized that this MUST be true as Sailor V lay in on her back, her eyes merely x's. She was whole, that was the main thing. So what did Musouka see?

The others didn't want to hang out anymore and soon began hinting to Minako that maybe Musouka should go home.

Musouka blinked, hearing a rather cruel comment by Rei. "Hey.. look, you guys want me gone, just tell me! You're a bunch of cowards if you're just going to talk about me behind my back, despite the fact that I'm five feet away! I'm not deaf you know!"

She pushed back from the game she was playing and saw her dim reflection. It was paler than usual and she glared at it before she threw around and tried to walk. But it wasn't a straight line as her body fell down, twitching as if in convulsions.

"Musouka! Musouka!" The voice was distant, as if she were hearing it across a crowded room.

Her body was choking. Her breathe was locked in her chest and her eyes were flashing with rainbow colors.

They swirled into one before shattering and she felt it then, the blackness left over by the colors, sucking into her veins, her body, her essence.

'Musouka...' Her voice, mingled with Baku's echoed. 'Musouka...trouble...' It was distant, too far to hear completely.

'I can't move...I'm frozen.. I'm trapped...I can't breathe...please.. help me...'

Her body jerked when a light pressed from one hand and rolled over her shoulders and body to the other hand. The white light began to swim around her, shoving the darkness farther away until all she saw was white.

And she woke up, her hand grasped by Usagi. Her eyes, so innocent and wide, stared at Musouka with compassion.

"I...I'm sorry..." She pulled up and staggered backwards. "I.. I have to go...I'm sorry.."

She fled the scene and could feel Baku begin to beat inside her head.

"I'm having enough trouble! Can't you like manifest yourself next to me!?" She was walking with fast legs.

"Can't you run?" He nearly howled in her ears. "Come on! Move it!"

She broke into a run with a grimace. She entered the new scene and saw another ghoulish monster sucking over a group of five sleeping people.

"Morpheus! Awaken..."

"Stop right there!" A voice shouted. Sailor Moon, along with Mercury, Mars, Jupiter, and Venus appeared behind her, startling her. "How dare you do such horrible things to people! I am the pretty sailor soldier Sailor Moon! In the name of the Moon, you're punished!"

"SHIT!" Musouka howled. She stared up at the ghoul, it's face stained with bleached red, its eyes nothing but black slices. "God, you're hideous.."

It opened it's mouth and began to suck like a vacuum. It was pulling her forward as she tried to step back. She was drawn in by that black hole. It was swirling with a gray light and she realized that it was the energy that it'd taken.

"Mars Fire Soul!"

"Jupiter Sparkling Wide Pressure!"

"Mercury Shabon Spray!"

The three attacks blew out the black hole and sent the monster reeling, the five victims spilling like pins.

"Strike!" Musouka shouted.

"Get out of here!" Venus shouted.

"Aye aye!" But she turned to flee and watched as her shadow jump out and suck her down to the ground. She started yelling like something was killing her and the other senshi were trying to tug on the shadow.

A wisp shot out from Musouka's body and it enveloped her, sucking the shadow into it's girth. The senshi jumped back, scared.

"Oh..." Musouka's eyes fluttered. "Ba..ku..." She stood up slowly and saw the others looking at her.

"Oh, like you're better than me! I know I got problems but staring at me doesn't help!" She shouted.

Venus said hurriedly. "You should run!"

"I hate running!" But she took to the side and fled, heaving in gasps.

"Venus Love Me Chain!" Venus attacked the ghoul. It screamed as Sailor Moon raised her scepter.

"Moon Princess Halation!"

And as it turned to dust, soft clouds emptied to the skies before disappearing altogether.

Musouka was halfway home by then. She was trying hard to not break.

"Just cause I'm different.. well, not like they're better! And stupid Minako! She wanted to be my friend, she says, but she acts just like her friends." Musouka sighed. "I'm not good with people, that's all."

She thought of those senshi. "They weren't much help to me," She thought darkly. "They couldn't even save me..."

'Try saving yourself on your own...' The thought struck out at her. 'You never needed anyone to begin with..'

"But.. But.. .I just wanted to be normal again!" She started to sob. "What happened to me! I don't understand anything! What have I become!?"

She tried to sneak in to her room but her mother popped out, with wide eyes. "So I think that went... well... Honey?"

Her mother reached out. Musouka flinched, remember the doctor's hand of stone and she pulled back. "DON'T TOUCH ME!"

Helen's face paled. "It's me, honey, mom..."

"I... I know that..." But Musouka's head was buzzing. "I... I just need to sleep."

She entered and closed the door, locking it afterwards.

"What the hell happened?" Baku began.

Musouka's back was toward the pig. "Thank you."

He blinked. "I...err.. couldn't let you get hurt anymore than you are now."

"It was using me!? How did it do that! I thought if I were a senshi, they'd leave me alone!"

"It's not so simple like that. As a senshi, yes, nightmares cannot get to you but you're still, well, human. You're vulnerable."

"But can't you make them go away.." She turned around, her eyes red as tears fell profusely. "I can't even sleep anymore! At this rate, I won't live to sixteen!"

"Lie down. I'll help you this one time," Baku's body changed into a transparent male. His hair was pink but really short and his eyes, though a bit see-through, were colored a dark violet, such as it looked black from far way. "Come on, hop into bed."

"Is this your true form?" She whispered. "Are you like an angel in disguise, waiting till I die? It's soon right?"

"Shuuu.." He pressed his hand against her forehead and she realized she could feel his heat, his touch. And she relaxed, her mind clearing of the clouds and cobwebs and she fell asleep.

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Morning came but Musouka couldn't get out. Thankfully it was Saturday as she turned over to go back to sleep. But her mind began to vision things like it always did. She was far away again, up high now. She felt as if she were flying. Someone was laughing, a little boy. She realized that the laughter was coming from her mouth but it wasn't her.

And suddenly, as soon as she realized that this wasn't her, she began to pummel to the ground. She screamed but no sounds came out as her fingers clawed. She was so high up now, the clouds were whipping her as gravity threw her down.

And she rolled her body and fell out of bed, her body heaving and her breath panting.

"Augh... I feel like shit.." She groaned, her pillow mashed against her cheek. She shoved it off and turned to see if Baku was around but he was gone. "Little piggy must have gone to eat or something.."

She sighed as she stretched, trying to keep her mind clear. The fear of falling was still deep within her but she tried to ignore it. After all, if she ignored it, it'd go away, right?

"Morning honey!" Helen smiled, a smile much too bright and strained.

"Hi.. Uh, I'm sorry about last night. I wasn't feeling well."

"It's all right. You DO feel better, right?"

"Uh huh... let's go with that. Say, you've seen Baku?"

"He wandered out the back door," Helen smiled as she turned to tend to the eggs she was cooking. "If you're hungry.." She turned around and Musouka was gone, the door still closing as she went out the back.

"Oh Baku..." Musouka called out and saw a familiar red bow and another set of heads that she recognized.

"Hi, Musouka!" Minako grinned. "We came to see if you were all right."

"I'm fine, why wouldn't I be? Baku, come."

"Baku's a pig, he can't an...swer..." Makoto trailed off as Baku loped over to Musouka before he snorted and rolled over at her feet, it's lips in a strained smile.

"Pigs SMILE?!" Rei blinked. "Wow..."

"It's just gas, like babies," Musouka said hurriedly.

"Oh, well, hello Minako," Ryuu came out with a easy step. "Are these more friends of yours?" He asked his daughter.

"Please! They made fun of me!" She snapped. She was starting to feel caught in a web of some sort.

"Oh... we wanted to apologize. We didn't realize you were.. err.. sick..." Usagi began.

"Sick? SICK! I'm NOT SICK! I'm as healthy as the rest of you stupid people!" Musouka's mind snapped as anger fueled to a boil. She was struggling to keep the top on but it was no use. "I'm HUMAN! Just cause I can't act like you doesn't mean that I'm SICK! You people always judge by looks don't you? DON'T YOU!?"

"Musouka!" Ryuu nearly shouted. His hand clamped her shoulder and she felt stabs of frozen ice. Her body jerked as she pulled back, trying to stop the convulsions.

"I'm not.. I'm not..." Her vision was graying but the people were all haloed by hues, bright and colorful hues. And she, she was black as night.

She curled into a tight ball, her shoulders heaving.

"Honey..." Her father knelt down. "It's all right. It'll be fine. Don't worry."

"I'm not.. not different.. I'm just me!" She sobbed as he pulled his child to him.

"Shuuu, I know, I know."

He looked up. "Please, leave."

"Oh but ..." Minako began.

"I'm sorry but she needs friends that can look beyond her problems," He said this tiredly, with little emotion.

"I'm sorry..." Minako whispered before she and the others leaving.

Baku had rolled over and zeroed in on the group as they passed, staring at them with his dark black eyes.

And they flinched, seeing something almost human in them, something accusing and questioning as well. 


	3. Chapter 3

The Dream Shaper Chapter Three: Knocking on My Door is Morpheus

Monday came fast. Musouka spent the Sunday resting. She just was so tired but once more she couldn't fall asleep. So she watched television all day. Not bad but she really wanted to sleep.

"Okay, just ignore people today. I've tried to be nice and you know what, screw them!!" Musouka said to herself.

She pulled the bag over her shoulder as she went to her locker. She fiddled with the lock and opened it. It moved in slow motion as she squinted her eyes to block the vision. Her hand shuffled in, trying to grasp any and all books. But it was the strange, somewhat thick paper that made her open her eyes.

"A envelope?" She fingered it before she opened it. It was a written apology from all the girls.

"So, are we forgiven?" Minako shocked Musouka as she appeared at the side.

"GOD! Where'd you come from?" Musouka sucked in air. "Yea, yea.. you're forgiven IF you don't scare me like that again!"

"Great! Um... so how are you?" Minako asked pointedly.

Musouka stared at her with a rather dead look. "I'm FINE, okay?"

She and Minako did hang out for the most part. Of course, there was class but Minako joined her for lunch.

"How much sweets do you eat?" Minako couldn't stop herself from asking.

"Not much.." Musouka sucked down a soda pop. "Besides, makes me feel better."

Minako blinked. "Err.. okay."

Musouka was starting to like the 'angel'. She had no other description for the blonde, save for being as light as air, both in body and mind but Minako was happy, something she had felt she had forgotten. Minako made her smile for a change.

By afternoon, they'd parted ways as she took a bus to her session.

"Back to the grind," She plopped in the armchair in the white room. The sun was hitting everything that had a reflection and for a moment, the doctor looked like he was a ghost, his body transparent.

"Musouka?" His voice broke in quietly. She'd been unaware of her fingers digging so tightly in the armchair, her nails were breaking.

"Huh? Oh...uh..hi.."

He smiled. "So, let's talk about Friday' session."

"Let's not and say we did!"

"I think we could make some progress. Now, the picture," He pulled out a sheet from his folder. "I did it to your extent but I'm afraid I couldn't make the faces."

She saw the picture and frowned. "But it's nothing like mine. It's.. emotionless."

"Well, I suppose it is," He smiled. "Why do you think that?"

"I don't know. Maybe because I drew it and you copied me."

He continued to smile. "A while ago, you mentioned that you didn't feel like yourself anymore. What happened to change you?"

For a moment, the idea of being a senshi crossed her mind but it wasn't right. Something else happened that she couldn't remember anymore.

And that scared her.

He was patiently waiting.

"I don't know. I can't remember."

"But it must have been traumatic if you think it changed you," he persisted softly.

"I said I don't remember," She breathed.

"Musouka..."

"I DON'T REMEMBER! I DON'T REMEMBER! It's like a nightmare I can't wake from! As if I'm here but I'm not real! WHAT AM I!?"

He spoke softly, soothingly. "You're all right, Musouka. You're all right. You've just have been going through some transitions. You're trying to find a purpose, if you will. What about getting a job?"

She shook her head.

"Volunteering?"

She frowned. "I don't think it's like that. I think I'm halfway out the door," but she was mumbling now as he leaned over straining to hear her.

"What did you say?"

"You think I'm crazy?" She asked suddenly.

"No, I don't."

"Like hell!" She shouted, angry breaking out in hives over her. Her hands came up and slammed against the table, the papers flying. She watched them, falling slowly in white rains and her eyes widened.

"I can't think straight, Doc. I mean, every time I fall asleep, my dreams, they become nightmares and I don't know why."

He smiled compassionately. "Well, your mother was discussing the medicine. Perhaps the other brand of..."

"NO! I don't want to be popping pills!"

"What about sleeping pills?" He suggested. "They can help you sleep."

"But what if I don't wake up?" It was a thought that she voiced without being aware of it.

"What makes you think you can't wake up?"

'Wake...I'm awake, right? This is the real me, the real life I'm living? I'm mean, I feel things, taste things, hear things? This is real.. it has to be..'

"I'm well aware I'm awake now..." She began.

"I didn't mention..."

"Oh look at the time! I got to go! See you Friday!" She pranced out, tripping over the threshold. "God, don't make me run!"

She disappeared out of the building and walked outside and found the sunlight once more beating on her.

It was blinding, triple folded than that of the room. She covered her face with her hand, the shadow blocking out the sun. The wind picked up, pressing to her side and for a moment, she saw her hand, raised up against the wind, flying with it. It was stretching outward like a cloud and she watched in amazement.

She wondered if the wind were even harder, would it completely blow her away? Or would something be left of her as a ruined memory?

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"Sleeping pills? SLEEPING PILLS?!" Ryuu growled. "Of all the nerve! Damnit! Why aren't these doctors any help?" He asked his wife.

She sipped her soup. "Honey, they're doing their best."

Musouka watched them, talking back and forth. She remembered how she couldn't remember that incident and she perked up.

"Hey, Mom, Dad. Um... do you remember when I began to have problems?" She asked rather lightly.

"You.. don't remember honey?" Helen asked gently.

"I can't, I guess," Musouka shrugged.

"Well," Ryuu scratched his chin thoughtfully. "I'll say about three years ago. You were in that car accident, remember?"

Something flashed in her mind, a set of lights vibrating in her head as they crashed forward into her. She flinched as she shook her head. "I ..I can't... remember..."

"The doctor did say there might be some memory loss," Helen said soothingly. "So it's natural that you can't remember the accident."

"But..." Musouka was trying to think before but it too was muddled. Oh sure, it was there but pieces of memories, shredded beyond comprehension. She frowned. "Oh... well..."

"Yes, sweetie?" Ryuu asked.

"Uh.. great meal, thanks mom!" She forced another bite. "Can I be excused?"

"Oh, well, all right. I made dessert though!" Her mother called out as Musouka ran out. She could imagine her mother reaching out with a look of total helplessness.

"Baku! Hey, what are you doing?" She asked breathlessly.

"Trying to sleep," He grunted.

"So.. um..."

"What?"

"Am I crazy? I mean, I keep thinking this isn't a real world, that I'm dreaming but I'm awake right?"

"Sounds like crazy talk."

"Guess it doesn't make much sense."

"Didn't say that," He rolled over. "We need to head downtown."

His body wafted into a wisp, shooting at her as she tried to yell in surprise. She reopened her eyes and found herself downtown, near the school.

"What..BAKU!?" She hissed.

'Start walking down the street,' Baku told her, very calmly.

She started to move, her feet like lead. She wasn't aware of commanding herself to move. Almost like she were a machine programmed only to move.

They were ahead, talking happily.

'The girls...Minako.. Ami... Usagi.. Rei... Makoto..' The names floated in her mind's eyes as well as each face. 'They're always around...'

She came to a stop in front of them. They turned to her and said something but her hearing was malfunctioning.

She saw their lips move and tried to hear them, to answer. It took a moment to realize that just behind them, their shadows were dancing wildly.

"Move.." She whispered.

"What?" They all spoke as one or was it just one of them?

"Move.." She hissed. She raised her hand automatically. "I have to.. I have to.."

There was a scream of terror down the street as people piled out of a bookstore.

"Come on and fall into your fantasies!" The clerk was bawling in laughter. It's head was cone shaped and it's teeth pressing it's lower lip till it broke through. It grinned devilishly as it held up books that became pillars of energy.

"Come on and take a ride with Huck Finn! Or go whale hunting for the great Moby Dick!" It howled.

Musouka's eyes had gotten huge.

"Run!" Makoto shouted.

"Wh..what? I can't.. my legs.." She whimpered as she fell down. Her body felt so heavy, she was breaking the cement. She watched the cracks and she began to scream, not in terror but rather in stunned hushed versions of shock.

"Musouka!" Voices, distant, screaming at her. Their voices, familiar but so aloof, were filled with terror, pain. She tried to grasp something, her fingers slipping and she watched as her ring rolled out from her, the single clicking notes onto the pavement. It was shining, calling her.

Her hand reached out and she felt it caught up and the fire brewed into her, sending the darkness into shattering lights.

"Morpheus, Awaken Me!" She cried out wildly. She curled and stretched, the cocoon blossoming into her fuku.

She stood up, her mind quite clear. "You take the great literature of ...well, whatever century they're from and ruin them? I don't think so! I'm Sailor Morpheus and it's time to make this your nightmare!"

"Hee...Ah, a fiery spirit! This book should suit you well," It held up a book entitled One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest.

"One, I've read that book and it's not all that like me and secondly, is this a pun that I'm crazy?" She said darkly. "Cause if it is, I'm NOT LAUGHING!"

It turned more books into energies that filled out toward her. She raised her hands and shouted, "Morpheus Nightmarish Hold!"

Black holes swallowed up the monster but in seconds, it broke it easily.

"SHIT!"

"Hey! How dare your ruined the treasures of our past...err, well American past! I am the pretty sailor soldier Sailor Moon! In the name of the moon, you're punished!" Sailor Moon, with her posse behind her, posed.

"Oh great! The cavalry is here!" Morpheus bit out.

She held up her hand and a long six foot weapon appeared.

It was a six foot gray metallic staff, the top was round and hollow with a spider's web etched in that hollowed section. It looked like a eight pointed web, as if it had a square overlapped by a diamond. At each point, on the inside of the outlined circle, were eight sky blue gems, each at each point. At the top of the staff's handle was where the material rounded downward into a detailed ball with a dangling tassel. The wrapped portion was blue but the tassels were gold and were three fourths longer than the wrapped portion. There was a tassel attached to each side of the staff. The bottom was flat but a inch or so from the edge was a sky blue band.

"Dream Snatch!" The web began to spin until it shot out like a torpedo, tugging over the monster until it was covered like mesh. It blossomed into lightning energy, electrocuting the monster.

"Fire Soul!"

"Sparkling Wide Pressure!"

"Shabon Spray!"

The attacks joined Morpheus's attack and really let the monster have it.

"Sailor Moon!" Venus called out.

"Moon Princess Halation!" Sailor Moon called out as the scepter beamed out an attack and turned the monster into dust.

"Well.. that was fun," Morpheus grumbled. She made to leave.

"Musouka!" One of the girls said loudly.

Morpheus frowned, looking behind her warily. 'Those other senshi...'

And she took off down the streets, leaving them behind.

She rounded the corner, heaving. She untransformed in a blink, her body shaking. "God, it's like I was ran over or something..."

'Vulnerability. I thought we discussed them,' Baku spoke dryly.

"Ah...yea.. well, I broke out of it, didn't I?"

'Good.. now if you could.. err.. never mind.'

"What? What were you going to say?"

But it was quiet.

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Musouka walked home slowly, feeling heavy and drugged. She thought she was attached to these vibrating wires, all over her arms and head. Each of them pulsed, shuttering through her as she tried to ignore them.

When that didn't work, she tugged at them but her fingers melted through them, appearing at the back as if she weren't even there to begin with.

She entered the house and walked to her room. It was dark, quiet. She had been unaware of the time lapsing into night and she tiptoed quietly. And as she looked in her room, she saw herself, sleeping. She moved slowly and examined herself.

This self was healthy looking, in a deep sleep that she'd forgotten all about. Musouka reached out and tried to touch that self, to bring it back into herself.

'Musouka, it's been a really good day today. The doctor says you've been showing some activity. He says you might even wake up..'

The voice, she knew who it was but she couldn't remember the name, the face of which that voice belonged.

'Honey, I miss you... I love you... I love you... I love...'

It faded and she staggered back, holding her head as pain ripped through her. 'Who am I? Where am I? What is this?'

She turned and flipped the light on and slowly, haphazardly turned around and saw the bed, perfectly made. Baku sat on his cushioned throne, his eyes staring at her with something not unlike pity.

"What?" She snapped. She stared at the bed and raised her hands slowly, studying them. She pressed them against her chest and for a moment, thought they would slip through her.

"I'm scared.. I'm getting worse and I don't know why..." She breathed. "Why do I exist? What kind of warrior am I? I'm... alive, right?"

"I think you need to sleep," Baku reported softly. "Come on, get some rest."

She went to the bathroom and began to brush her teeth. She watched the water swirling in that endless spin, falling downward as if into a black hole. She looked up and saw herself in the mirror as she tried to take a deep breath.

But the mirror was quiet and she went to her bedroom to undress.

"How much time passed?" She asked idly. "That's never happened before."

"Huh? Only a few hours. You passed out, probably."

She pulled on her nightgown. "Baku, who or what are you? I mean, you came to me but I don't know why?"

"You need me, Musouka. I am a part of you."

"How?"

"You'll see, some time soon, promise," He rolled over and fell asleep in moments.

She fingered the ring. She tried to remember when she had it first. Baku hadn't given it to her. In fact, he only seemed to tell her that one phrase of senshi power but inwardly, she knew it long before. Why? Did she just imagine it? Or was she really this, a senshi and not a mortal?

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School came and she found it easier to enter. Probably because Minako was so friendly, it made her day feel better.

"I'm going to the arcade again. Wanna come?" Minako quipped.

"What about your friends?"

"They're be there," Minako smiled brightly. "They're looking forward to seeing you again."

'Uh huh, right. I've heard that before.'

"For how long?" Musouka asked.

"We like to spend a few hours there. Later, we're going to Rei's home. She lives in the Hikawa Shrine."

"Oh...I've heard of that.. somewhere.."

"Well, it's pretty popular. We can get love charms there!"

Musouka blinked. "I'm not that much into romance right now. I'm really just trying to discover myself."

"Oh really? Tell me, what other sides do you have?"

"Huh? There's just me, what you see. What other side would I have?"

"Well," Minako scratched her nose. "We all have different sides of us. Take me! I'm a school girl and a blossoming singer!"

"But can't you be both in one self?"

Minako's smile faded. "Oh.. well, I guess but there are times when we're all different completely. Like a hidden self that's a secret."

"What secret self would you have?" Musouka shook her head. "No, all that we are is just what we are. We are just made of different levels. That doesn't mean we're just counterparts."

"I'm getting a headache," Minako smiled, slowly rubbing her temples. "You can talk rather smart, you know that?"

"I just do a lot of thinking. It's just not daydreaming."

Minako laughed softly. "So, you coming with me?" She resumed her smile.

"Sure, why not."

Musouka pulled off her book bag and rid it of a few of the unnecessary books. She swung the lock as it clicked to stay stuck until the next time she opened it.

They walked out quietly until the bus station. "We seem to travel a lot by bus. One of these days we should just walk," Musouka suggested.

Minako snorted. "I prefer getting places in a faster mode. Walking is too much work."

"You'd work your calves."

"What? Are you saying I'm fat?"

"No, not like that. But it'd build your stamina."

"So why don't you run if you like walking."

"PLEASE! I hate running. It means I'm in a hurry and I'm never in a hurry to begin with!"

Minako burst out laughing. "I like that kind of logic! Now if we could get Ami to think like that!"

"Ami, that blue haired smartie right? I keep bumping into her at the hospital."

"Her mom works there," Minako offered as a way of explanation.

"Oh..." Musouka nodded. "I understand now."

"So... you like seeing a shrink?" Minako asked idly.

"Huh? Yea, I guess. We've been making a breakthrough but I.. once it's out in the air, I can't talk about it anymore..."

"About what?"

"Whatever we started talking about. It could be anything. I get set off and my mind goes blank..."

Musouka sighed. "I personally think I'm crazy. I'm just a functional person with a few loose screws."

"Oh please! You're not crazy..." Minako grinned. "You want crazy.. wait, no, that can't work.." Minako burst out laughing, keeping whatever inside joke she was hiding.

They climbed onto the bus and sat down. Minako was increasingly getting agitated, Musouka noted.

"Hey... what's wrong?"

"Remember when we were discussing about different selves? What if we saw one of yours but you didn't know ours?"

"What are you talking about?"

Minako was looking out of the window as the bus pulled up, the girls waving to her. "Musouka.. we need to talk."

"You know, every time I heard that line, something bad happens!" Musouka frowned. "Tell me right now what's up!"

She followed Minako. The girls perked up and began walking away, Minako following.

"Wait! Wait! STOP!" Musouka shouted but they were ignoring her. She followed, her anger raising until her vision was so narrowed over the group, she was chewing her lip in angst.

"WELL?!" She snapped darkly. They had reached a small opening of street, leading into a park.

Minako sighed. "We saw you transform, remember?"

"What?" Musouka was drawing a blank.

"You're ... Sailor Morpheus."

"What? You.. saw that? I... can't remember.." Musouka frowned. "But you ran off, right? Where did you..."

Minako sighed before glancing back at the others. "Musouka, we are the Sailor Senshi."

"What?"

"I'm Sailor Venus."

"What?"

"Musouka, are you all right?"

"You mean you're real?!" She didn't know why she said that. She had seen them, heard them before but it never registered that they were REAL. Something was off about that fact, disappearing into the far corners of her mind and memories and she frowned.

"I...I'm sorry. I .. well, what do you want to do about it?" Musouka's eyes darkened. "You probably wanna get rid of me, huh? Why you walked to a secluded place..."

A happy couple passed by, the elderly woman giggling as the old man held his wife close to him.

"Okay, not secluded.. but you're going to threaten me, aren't you?"

"We're not the one that acts all high," Rei snapped.

"I'm not high! I'm a little warped that's all."

"How did you awaken?" Makoto asked.

"Where are you from? What's your purpose?" Rei asked.

"Do you have any memories of a past life? Do you know why you've awaken here and now?" Ami began.

"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Musouka shouted. Each question had slapped her in the face and she realized she couldn't answer them. She couldn't remember. Why couldn't people understand that! "I don't know! I woke up one day and my guide told me I had to wake up! I became Morpheus but I don't know why! I can't remember!"

"You never remember!" Makoto began.

"What do you know!?" Musouka, whispered, rage etched in every letter. "What the hell gives you the right to look at me like that?!"

"We're not.." Minako began.

"You're just like them! You never wanted to be my friend! You never liked me! EVERYONE HATES ME! I didn't do anything!" She was sobbing, air sucking into her lungs and forcing out in painful gasps. "I just want to fall asleep! LET ME SLEEP! LET ME GO! WHY ARE YOU HOLDING ME HERE!" Her voice reached a high screeching tone and something seemed to rip the time apart. The others were watching her, horror in their features.

Musouka was fading, into the nothingness that called to her. The ghosts, they were clamping at her ankles, her arms, biting her. She saw her blood, black as night, spilling out into a pool.

She saw lights, two beams of light, hit her again and again. She was in pain, she was shaking. Someone was crying her name, holding her. She couldn't think anymore and her mind began to snap under the pressure.

'Sleep.. let me sleep...' Her eyes fluttered slowly. 'Let me go...'

'No.. no, don't let go...' Her voice, Baku's voice, took a pleading tone. 'Just wake up, Musouka.. please wake up...'

'I can't! I can't... why am I here? What am I?'

'Musouka.. if you give up.. you won't ever get up.. you won't wake up.. you'll be lost...'

'But I'm already dying...'

'You keep thinking like this.. of course you will. If you break that barrier of dreaming.. you can wake up.. wake up ...'

Musouka's eyes opened as screams came from the park.

It was a large group that was targeted. They fell into demented sleep, their minds wiping clear as the monster sucked them dry.

"Morpheus, awaken me!" Musouka called out as she transformed.

She watched the others transform in amazement, still not believing that they were senshi.

"Moon Crystal Power Make Up!"

"Mercury Planet Power, Make Up!"

"Mars Planet Power, Make up!"

"Jupiter Planet Power, Make Up!"

"Venus Planet Power, Make Up!"

The five stood together, Sailor Morpheus straggling at the side.

'They're ...they're real?' Morpheus gulped. 


	4. Chapter 4

The Dream Shaper Chapter Four: Unlock My Chains This Nightmare of Mine

She stood off to the side, eyeing them. She couldn't think. She knew them from somewhere else, something she had read, not seen.

"How dare you attack people in a wondrous park! I am the pretty sailor soldier Sailor Moon and in the name of the Moon, you're punished!" Sailor Moon shouted.

"Can you come up with some BETTER lines?" Morpheus harrumphed and sighed in one breath. This caused her to nearly choke but she quickly found her feet again.

"Dream eater! Time's up! I hope you're ready for your nightmare cause I'm about to dish it out to you!" Morpheus shouted. "Morpheus Nightmarish Hold!"

The black holes swarmed over the enemy as it tried to blast the attacks away. But it sucked down to the ground and everything began to be pulled by it.

Morpheus frowned. "No.. no, no! That's not supposed to happen! My attack... NO GET THOSE PEOPLE AWAY FROM THERE!"

Sure enough, the black hole was sucking the people into itself. Still sleeping, they all looked so peaceful and calm.

But Morpheus wasn't. She took off and ran straight to the black hole. She watched her entire front stretch forward into that sucking machine and she turned, looking back with a wild gaze.

'I'm...'

And she broke in half. Her body completely disintegrated into the darkness and suddenly, she felt around her, a soft cushioning. Her vision was coming slowly, a dot of light beaming into her mind and spreading outward until the light was blinding her.

But that, too, cleared. She was on the pavement of some sidewalk. She looked around and found words, English words. She thought she couldn't read them but looking upon them, she could say those words with ease. As if it were her language but how could that be, she was Japanese.

She stood up slowly, no one paying attention to her at that moment. She began to walk slowly, looking around in amazement. She wondered what year, what time, what place she'd gotten into.

She was passing by a shop window and looked in for a moment to see what was inside when she saw her reflection.

Her hair was brown, her eyes green. She had Caucasian skin but it was broken out a little bit. She looked younger than she thought she was, around thirteen or even twelve.

She wore jeans and a black t-shirt, the writing on it worn out so much you couldn't read it. She reached out to touch the window and realized something about her body.

It was different than that of her reflection. She was still in her senshi form as she stared at her gloved hand.

'What do people see?' She thought suddenly. She turned quickly and tried to look people in the eyes but they passed her, ignoring her.

'Why are they ignoring me? Can't they see me?'

She turned to look back at the reflection. 'No wonder they can't. She's boring. Nothing remarkable about her. She's a nobody...a nobody...'

She gazed down at her self. "But now.. I'm somebody, right? Because.. Because I'm a senshi right?"

She began to walk again. She walked easily, as if she'd been in this town forever. Places she could see but she couldn't name it, the places, the town or the people. As if she had existed once here but something disturbed her, breaking her into two.

And everywhere she went, her reflection was always of that girl. She was still in her fuku but that other self bothered her. It irked her that it followed so closely. That reflection, that self looked so sad.

And that self, sometimes, just in flashes of lights, seemed be dripping blood at the forehead.

Morpheus began to shake slowly. It was fear, just budding underneath her skin, trying to break out. Her heartbeat was shattering her throat and she turned a corner and wretched.

"I have to get home.." She panted, wiping her mouth. She was dizzy again and wondered what would happen if she fell into darkness now. Would she completely be gone? Not like anyone noticed her to begin with. She wouldn't be missed.

But she saw her parents, crying earnestly. But they were somewhere far away, the room was white and she found herself blinded once more.

'Musouka...Musouka!'

'Baku...' Morpheus tried to open her eyes. But it was like they were nailed shut. Her body was shivering, she was cold. She could feel them, wires again, clamping onto her. She was aware of her head the most, buzzing with information, draining it from her. She tried to reach up but her hands were cemented down. 'I can't.. I can't... waken...'

"My precious child, Mommy misses you."

'Who are you? You're not my mother!'

"Hi honey, it's dad again. I brought the newspaper, to keep you posted on today's news..."

'No! No! They're not real! I am! This is a nightmare! I'm alive damnit! Can't you see that!'

"I miss her so much. The doctors kept saying she was improving but she just won't wake up..."

"Don't worry. We will have faith that one day, she'll return to us..."

'I'm here. I'm right here! Please... stop this.. I hurt so much.. Baku.. BAKU BAKU BAKU!!'

And she fell forward out of the black hole. To the others and those around, it was as if she merely walked through it but her body was covered in sweat, the bile taste still in her mouth. She was sobbing, her fingers digging into the earth as she turned to rage against the hole.

It shattered to reveal the enemy, bigger, badder. It grinned darkly. "So nice.. to be full of nightmares...Master.."

"You... you fucking piece of shit! I'm GOING TO KILL YOU!"

"Dream Snatch!" She screamed as her weapon formed. It crackled with impossible energy and latched tightly onto the monster.

It began to scream but her grip tightened. Her vision was disappearing, her body slouching but she continued the attack, panting.

'Stop.. stop it... STOP IT!" Baku formed in front of her, as that young man. His eyes were dark as he reached out and clamped her shoulders.

He was frigidly cold, the shock seeping into her in seconds, breaking her trance. "LET ME GO! LET ME GO!" She raised her hand to attack Baku himself but his body misted. His hands still held her, his eyes brightening.  
"Shuu...It's all right.. It'll be all right.." His voice was soft, warm. It reminded her of her mother but the vision that came wasn't like the mother she was used to. This one had brown hair and dark eyes.

"Ba..baku..."

"Destroy it!" Baku shouted to the others. Morpheus had forgotten about them.

"Moon Princess Halation!"

Morpheus mind was in pieces. She felt so tired as she struggled to get away from Baku. "WHO ARE YOU! What are you! Can't you just let ME SLEEP!"

She collapsed onto her knees, her chest heaving. She was pulsing with energy and voices, always those two voices, began to echo in her head.

"Shut up! Shut up! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"Musouka... listen to them.." Baku spoke so softly, gently.

Her eyes were fire, glaring up at him. "No... NO! This is me! This is the real me!!"

Her voice echoed in the air and her words came back to her. She tried to cover her ears, tried to clear her head but she began to hurt all over. She turned and ran, unaware that she wasn't in senshi form. She ran and ran until she was home and staggered in.

Her mother looked up and nearly screamed at the ragged look of her daughter. Musouka fell to her knees again and her head tilted forward. She watched splotches of blood dripping down and her hand moved slowly to the wound upon her brow. It was in the shape of her senshi symbol.

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The doctor at the emergency was quiet at he studied the notes. "She says she wasn't hit by anything. Was there a wound there from before?"

"No, never," Helen whispered.

"Doctor, do you think.. she hurt herself on purpose?" Ryuu asked thickly.

"Has she had a history of hurting herself?"

"She's been sick but we haven't been able to figure out anything."

"It might be psychological. Does any mental diseases run in your family?"

"There is nothing wrong with our family!" Helen nearly shouted, in tears.

"Has she been getting help?" The doctor asked carefully.

"She's seeing another doctor, yes but he says there's been little progress," Ryuu answered, Helen far too upset to say anything.

"Well, we should keep her overnight. Tomorrow we'll do psychoanalysis to see if she has anything significant about her. But what from the way she acts and talks, she seems to be confused greatly."

"We could easily have seen that!" Helen snarled. "All of you doctors are the same! You can't do a damn thing for her!"

"I'm sorry but I'm doing my best. With more studying.."

"STUDYING! STUDYING!? That's all you ever do!"

"We could prescribe..."

"DAMNIT! That's all you ever suggest too! You'll end up having her halfway dead if you keep having her take such medicine."

"You didn't let me finish. They're anti-depressant pills. They would calm her down and keep her stable.."

"She's already on that type," Ryuu answered.

"Maybe another brand?"

"No, she will not change to another type. It'll be the same results," Helen stood up. "I'm taking her home."

"It would be best if we kept her..." The doctor began.

"Yes, it's a suggestion. Doesn't mean we have to allow it," Helen said coldly. "I'm getting my daughter." She turned and stomped off out of the room.

"I'm sorry. We've been so stressed. We are really worried. She's gotten worse."

"Have you thought about hospitalization?" The doctor asked carefully. "If the doctors and nurses spend more time with her, it might make it easier on her."

"Doctor, all Musouka wants is to be normal. But she's struggling with herself about something within her and I don't think it's something the doctors can solve. I think it's something only she can do."

He shook the doctor's hand. "Thank you for helping though. Excuse me."

Helen was fussing over Musouka. "Oh my poor baby! Does it hurt much?"

"No.." Musouka looked as if she weren't even there. Her eyes were glazed and she was so tired.

"Mama will take care of you," She gently pulled her to begin walking. And they trudged, all together, to the car.

Night came and Musouka lay in bed, her eyes staring unblinking at the ceiling.

"Musouka?" Baku transformed into the male form. "Talk to me."

"It hurts... my head..."

"I know. If I could take the pain away, I would."

"Baku...I'm not real, am I?"

"You're wrong. You're just confused. You just need to wake up, that's all."

"That thing.. it called me Master. Did I make it?" Musouka shifted over to her side, curling into a fetus position. "I'm so tired...I want to sleep..."

"Wake up, please, for God's sake, wake up," Baku lay on his knees, his hands cupped over her own as he knelt to the side of the bed. "Musouka, you have to remember what happened."

"But I can't.." She was falling asleep, her eyes becoming heavy.

"Don't fall asleep.." His voice whispered in her head.

"I'm so tired...just so tired...why am I fighting this? If I just fell asleep.."

'Honey, Mommy's here again. It's been a while since any improvement but I think you're getting better, no matter what the doctor says...'

'Please, wake up...we want you to be all right honey...'

'We can't pull the plug on our daughter! What if she could wake up tomorrow? We would never know!'

'We have to go on with our lives. It's been three years...'

'Three years...'

'Three years..'

"Three years," she whispered. "Something happened that time, long before I met you...or was it just before I met you? I can't remember."

And she was still that night, Baku by her side in constant worry.

But all she did was sleep. Only sleep.

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Musouka got up that morning bright and early. She was thoughtful but not quite at that happy stage that Minako always was. But she thought if she acted like Minako, she'd feel better.

It didn't work but she had fun pretending to be someone else. That reminded her of something but instead of forcing thought on it, she ignored it.

"Hi honey," Helen beamed, her eyes red and swollen. Musouka's smile faded.

"Mom... you've been crying? Why?"

"Wh...why? Honey, I was worried, so worried about you," Helen's eyes misted. "How do you feel today?"

"I feel better. I really don't remember what happened.. I think I might have been hit by a car or something..." Musouka said quietly, thinking out loud.

"What? Did you see the driver?"

"The driver.." Something flashed and she pinpointed it. "He was drinking. I think he was drunk."

"And he just drove OFF?" Her voice was angry.

"Mo..mom..." Musouka's eyes widened as she stepped back. "Why... why are you angry?"

"Honey, somebody hit you with a car! You should be angry too!"

"But Mom... he.. he didn't..."

'He didn't make it...How did I know that? What memory is this? I can remember it but I can't place it...'

"Musouka?" Ryuu popped in. "Minako is here to see you."

"Ryuu..." Helen started to talk to her husband. Musouka walked out to the front and peered out at the screen door.

"Yes?"

"How are you feeling?" Minako looked worn out for some reason. The other girls appeared, along with a tall man that she recognized as Usagi's boyfriend and two feline cats. They had symbols on their foreheads.

"Hey...are those Luna and Artemis?" She asked without thinking.

"How... did you know that, Musouka?" Ami asked carefully.

"I read about them."

"What?"

"In a ma..ma...manga..." She was talking, trying to stop herself but it was flying out of her mouth.

"A manga..." Usagi blinked. "You mean from Sailor V?" Her voice was weak.

Musouka pushed back. "I.. I..."

"Musouka.." Minako's voice brought the other back. "Can we walk and talk?"

"No..NO! I don't want anything to do with you!" She shouted and turned to see her family staring at her with sad eyes.

And for a moment, they changed into other people but she knew them so well but she couldn't say who they were. If she did...

"LEAVE ME ALONE! BAKU! BAKU!" She screamed as she turned and fled, wisps of white swarming around her.

'Wake up.. wake up..'

"I made them, didn't I! I created them! I'm the monster! The enemy! WHY WHY WHY!!"

'Wake up..'

"I CAN'T! It hurts! Oh god it hurts!" Her hand pressed to her bandaged forehead and she was bleeding again, the hand getting coated in the sticky mess. She stared at her hand, her body shaking.

"I'm dead.. I'm DEAD!"

'Please.. just ...wake.. up...'

Baku's voice was fading farther away. Musouka began to panic. "No.. don't leave me! DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE! I DON'T WANT TO BE ALONE! BAKU! MOMMA! DADDY! WAKE ME UP! WAKE ME UP!"

Her arms wrapped around her as she began to sob. She fell to her knees and felt the ground soften, become pliable underneath her. Everything began to run together as she screamed and screamed, the high pitch shattering the glass windows. They flew at her, cutting her as she continued to howl.

She was locked, still locked. She had always been trapped in that cage. She could see herself, see those dead spirits calling to her. Faces came to her, familiar and some not so familiar.

Her grandmother, her uncle, her cousin. That friend that died from something she never found out about. That classmate that killed himself because it was just too much pressure for living.

All of them were suffocating her, telling her to go to sleep, to join them.

"No.." She spoke but it wasn't her, in her voice, it was all around her, echoing and pressing outward, the ghosts spilling away.

"I don't want to die... I don't.." Her eyes began to rain with tears and she held her hands in prayer.

"Please... wake me up.. I just want to be me again..."

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Musouka awoke in her bed, her parents sleeping on the chair and floor. Baku was settled at her feet as he snored, loudly.

She blinked and rubbed her eyes. "Was it all a dream?" She stood up slowly, feeling woozy. "Oh god, I feel like I've been hit by a..."

She blinked and couldn't finish that line. She went to take a shower and she reached up to her head to pull the bandages off. But they were gone.

She looked at her reflection and saw that there was no wound. "All a dream? No... something happened, didn't it? I have to remember..."

But she knew better to force it now. Every time she did, she broke into pieces. She had to let it come to her, not have her chasing it.

She showered and felt the water, warm and soothing, roll over her. She was trying hard to keep her mind in clarity. She wasn't trying to think at all.

But of course, the mind cannot just shut off. She found herself thinking instead of the day ahead.

It was a good Thursday. "Forget Good Friday, give me any Good Day and I'm happy," Musouka laughed at her own stupid joke. "God, I'm a idiot."

She sat down in the living room and flicked it on. She beamed happily, unaware of her parents watching her with a worried look.

"She's acting like she's fine now.." Ryuu whispered.

"But she'd never acted like this... I think something is going to happen," Helen whispered back.

"We should just wait."

"Yes, just wait." The two parents separated and headed off to work. Musouka continued to watch television. She was clicking, trying to find something good to watch but she choose a cartoon instead of all of those soap operas that'd been on at that time.

"I love this cartoon! I haven't seen since I was like four!"

The cartoon, something nameless, was in English. Yet as she listened, she could understand what the characters could say.

"Hey, Mom? Dad?" It took her a moment to realize that they were gone and currently working.

"Hey, Baku?" She walked down the hallway to her room and found the pig eating food that Helen had brought to him. "Hey, Baku, do I know English by any chance?"

"Why do you ask?" He grunted as he swallowed a cutup carrot noisily.

"I'm watching a cartoon in the living room and it's in English. It doesn't even have subtitles." She was trying to laugh.

He looked up, his snort wiggling slightly as he finished off his last bite. "You're starting to wake up, you realize that?"

Her smile faded. "I'm... trying to not think, you know?" She talked, conversationally but her eyes were wide with fright. "I just want to try to be normal..."

"You were always normal. You just have a very vivid imagination."

'You just have a very vivid imagination,' the other woman, who called herself Mom as well, was smiling at her. She felt little, like a child again. 'It's all right to dream, honey. You shouldn't let others pick on your dreams..'

'So I can be Sailor Moon?'

The woman was laughing. 'You can be anything you want to be. Maybe you could write stories about your 'adventures'.'

'A story person! I wanna be a story person!' She was jumping, she was so excited. 'People will like me then, right Mama?'

'Honey, they like you now.. Don't believe bullies, believe in me and all the others that love you.'

The woman's hand came out and stroked Musouka's childish face. It was a warm hand, full of love. Musouka, with her chubby fingers, clutched back, her eyes wide with happiness. She felt it in her breast, spreading out to her as she smiled widely.

'We love you for who you are... vivid imagination and all. After all, dreams are what our future becomes, right? When we dream, we create our reality. It's very important...'

'Mama...'

"So if I'm real, then why do I feel like I'm dreaming?" Musouka snapped out of that memory, still feeling the warmth along her face. She traced that cheek absently, staring at him with accusing eyes.

"Because for all you know, this could be a different KIND of reality," Baku snapped back. He was angry.

"Why are you pissed?!"

"Because YOU ARE!" He shouted back at her.

They glared at each other before she turned and stomped off, trying to calm herself down.

"Stupid Baku.. more like Baka!" She turned the television off but still sat on the couch. She sighed quietly.

"I just don't get this anymore.. Maybe I should just commit myself."

She looked around before standing up again. She went back to her room and opened her safety cubby but the candy was gone.

"Did you eat this?" She glared at Baku.

"Your mother took it all."

"But how did she know?" Musouka stared at it. "It's pretty hidden."

"Not for a watchful mother's gaze," Baku rolled over to his back, his eyes glittering at her.

"Baku, what kind of guide are you? You're always vague, you have no magic except eating dreams and you can shape shift into a man! He's your real form, right? Huh? Am I right?"

"No, I take that kind of form because YOU'RE comfortable."

"You're dropping me a hint, right? So then, let's see, if you're not a man, are you a gruesome monster draining me of MY dreams?"

"No, that's not what I do. It's something very, very different."

She waited but his silence said his answer. She went to her desk and opened a drawer, pulling out her money safe.

"I thought you were saving."

"I'm taking out five dollars. FIVE dollars. It's not going to kill somebody."

She pocketed the money and headed outside. She locked the door with a resounding click and jumped down all the steps in one leap.

She nearly fell on her face doing that stunt. She mumbled to herself as she caught her balance before heading back down the street toward the corner store.

"Hey, Boss," She greeted the old man.

"Hey, Missus. The same today?" He smiled a toothless smile.

'You'd think that'd deter me.. but nope!'

She plucked two candy bars and peanut butter M&M's. The instant she saw those peanut buttery goodness, she knew she just HAD to get them.

She took off for home, plopping a few pieces of M&M's in her mouth. She was happy, if just in that moment.

But her mind was slowly shifting.

'That woman, she looks like that reflection. I wonder, if this isn't the real me on the outside, could this be my soul within my body?' She wondered to herself. She stopped quietly. "It'd sure as hell would explain why I feel like I could disappear. My body dies, so does my spirit. But then, why does this feel so real to me?"

'You have a very vivid imagination.'

"Imagination... Is that all that girl had? She wasn't somebody until she made stories to make her into a special person. But.. she never needed to dream inside, did she? She could've always.. been someone on the outside."

She came to a stop. "But she gave up without even trying... Just like I'm trying to...so what's stopping me?"

And Baku flashed in her memory. "Baku... he came to me when this all started..." She tried to take a deep breath as she began to shake.

"He's been what's keeping me alive, isn't he? He's not just a guide... he's.. ME"  
Baku appeared in front of her, a huge grin on his face. "It's about time you realized who I was..."

And he changed, into that girl. She wore a simple nightgown as she smiled happily.

"Are you my soul?"

"Not quite... I'm your ability to dream." She smiled. "I was always hiding in my books, my stories. Sailor Moon was my absolute favorite."

Her smile faded. "But I couldn't get along with others. I was always afraid so in my dreams, I became a warrior, a great person who could do wonderful things."

"But watching you, I realized that this wasn't what I truly wanted. I didn't just want to dream about it, I wanted it to be real..."

"You were always looking to be normal, to be accepted for who you are. We let ourselves be bullied and picked on and we grew weak. All we had were our hearts and that we locked away in dreams."

"But Mama... she told us we could do something with those dreams. Tell me, what do you want to do with your dreams?"

"I... I want to live them..." Musouka whispered. "I'm so tired of living like this. I always felt it was fake. I guess that's what it took to remind me that reality is much more important. If I could make my dreams a reality, I wouldn't be locked up anymore."

"So do you want to wake up now?" And she held up her hand expectedly. 


	5. Chapter 5

The Dream Shaper Chapter Five: Break Away From My Cage

Musouka reached out slowly.

"You take my hand, you'll have to face your final trial," She said quietly.

Musouka hesitated at that. "What do you mean?"

"You're still trapped, Musouka. Only you can break that barrier of yours."

Musouka stilled. "Could I...say goodbye to my family?"

She smiled. "They're not real though."

"But they feel like it.. Please?"

"Sure..." And she became Baku's male form. He followed her and Musouka, as she walked toward the house, noted everything melting down.

She saw them ahead, those she had fashioned herself after. They looked over at her and were smiling, truly smiling, Usagi, Ami, Rei, Makoto, and Minako.

They were waving, calling out goodbye as Musouka entered the house she had called home. She watched the pictures turn to molten colors as she looked forward and entered the kitchen.

"Mom? Dad?" She spoke softly. The two figures looked up with smiles. "I'm going to get help now. Thank you... for being with me."

"We would do anything for you, honey." Helen smiled widely.

"We love you.. no matter who you are.." Ryuu added.

"I fashioned them too, didn't I? That's why we got along so well."

"You instill so much emotions in your creations, they become not just a part of you, they become themselves," Baku agreed.

She turned and walked back outside. The sun overhead was half melted and she opened her hand slowly, the ring glittered.

"This ring... this was what I always wanted.. to find love. It all became this, a ring. Of acceptance, love, and assurance that I would be somebody if to just that one person. But I don't have to be to one person," She held it close to her chest, smiling as she cried.

"Baku, let's go home."

She held out her hand as Baku smiled and took the offered, light shining through.

And as they disappeared, everything turned to white and what had long since been dreamt, faded back into memories of dreams.

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She awoke in the darkness and for a moment felt fear. But she was aware suddenly of her heartbeat and held up her hands. She was glowing with warm, soothing light.

She looked around at the gray, old bars of the cage. She pressed against them, the cold seeping in through her. She gritted her teeth and curled her fingers around them tighter, ignoring the cold.

"NO! The world isn't cold! It's warm!"

She remembered her mother's hand along her face. "Mama.. Papa! I'm coming home! I won't run away anymore!" She pulled back and threw herself again and again against the bars.

She stared at it, the bars unforgiving. "No.. I won't give up.. not this time, not ever again! I believe in the stories of heroes, of people who meant everything to the world!"

"They all started out as me, afraid and unsure of this world. I want to be free, just like them! I want to go home! I want to love my family! I want them to love me! I want be me again!"

She grasped two adjacent bars and began to pull them apart, sobbing as the cold climbed her limbs.

"I don't need superpowers...I don't need other heroes...I can be somebody if I want to be somebody! I WON'T GIVE UP ANYMORE!"

She heard it then, voices, familiar ones.

"We haven't got much choice. The doctors aren't exactly much help," Her father spoke bitterly.

"I refuse to give up," Her mother said evenly. Her hand came up and grasped her daughter's hand. "She's still here! I swear, I could see her, hear her in my dreams! We can't give up!"

"I didn't say I would," He looked down upon her. Musouka could see them, their love and devotion in their eyes.

And as the bar gave in only a little, her hand slipped out. "Mama.. Dad, please, hold on to me!"

Her fingers stretched. She was breaking the bar with her other hand.

And as she pressed the more harder despite the cold, a warmth filtered through her. It was in her hand, spreading downward.

"Mama..." She smiled tearfully. "You never would give up... You always told me that to be strong, you had to be there for others..."

Her father had pulled onto her other hand, his eyes misted.

"Papa.." His warmth escalated in her other hand and the bar melted down in the fire of his love.

And she stepped out. The ghosts of her past, of her nightmares, appeared, reaching out to strike. But her hands reached out, the warmth turning to light and it blew away the creatures.

"I'm waking up!" She called out. "Wait for me!"

And as the two parents lay their head in defeat, as the doctor entered, something happened.

They couldn't see it, the way she shined in back into her self. But her mother's eyes widened as she felt a squeeze in her hand.

"Stacey? STACEY!" Her mother's face nearly broke as she smiled and cried.

"Oh dear god! Thank you! Thank you!" Her father sobbed.

And she opened her eyes, the world blinding for just a moment. And for a single moment more, she saw Baku, watching her with a warm smile.

"Goodbye, Morpheus..." He whispered before fading into nothing.

And Stacey Helen awoke, after three long years of being in a coma.

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The rehab was difficult, but she awoke each day with a smile and went to sleep with a smile. She felt happy, truly happy.

And as she took her first walks, she smiled as her mother offered her arm. "No need Mom. I'm strong enough by myself!"

But she stilled as she looked up at her mother. "But you know, I could still use a shoulder to hold onto."

And her mother offered her shoulder and Stacey hugged her, her eyes misted. "You're so warm, Mom... I forgot about how nice this was."

And her mother smiled, as she petted her daughter's shoulder. "Soon, you'll be able to go home, how does that sound?"

"That sounds wonderful.." She said brightly. She saw her father ahead, holding a bouquet. "Daddy..."

"What?" He grinned. "For my two girls!" He grinned as he offered them.

And she held them in her hands, the scent wafting to her nose. "They're so beautiful...everything.. is so wonderful again.."

She came home, months later. She looked up at the house and recognized it instantly. She laughed inwardly as she saw the same rooms, the same steps, of the same place she called home that was indeed really home.

She walked up the steps and saw her cousins, her aunt and uncle smiling. She saw neighbors all waiting for her to come to them.

And she pulled away from her parents, the crutches she should've needed falling. And she walked proudly back home, all the while smiling.

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It took a long time for her to catch up to everything. Learning to do things over, to return back to school. Of course, several people tried to their old routine of picking on her. But she began to laugh at one of them.

"Yea, I guess it does look like a crescent moon shape," She agreed laughing, rubbing at the wound. "The doctor says it's nearly gone though and with surgery, it can be gone completely. But I don't know, you really think I should keep it?"

And she grinned at the surrounding boys. One of them was angry for sure but the others were smiling, laughing with her. And finally, he broke into a smile. "You know, it does look kinda cool. Maybe you should keep it!" He laughed.

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She walked quietly, out of the classroom. She smiled as the students ran past her. It'd been a good ten years since she awoke and she was just starting out in her teaching career.

She continued down, waving to some of the teachers. You could barely see it but she still bore that mark upon her forehead. She was older, wiser. She had a slight limb and sometimes, her memory tired and she forgot things.

She got outside, the sun beaming down at her. The end of the year, children were walking home.

And she went along with them. She found she loved walking. It helped her open her eyes to others, as she looked around at the trees and streets, the busy cars and people, the children laughing as they played games with each other.

And she smiled as she entered a building. It was fairly new and would someday soon be a library. She was heading to one room only.

She went in, the door creaking open as she spotted several children sitting patiently. A picture akin to a fairytale story was taped up and her book was positioned on a desk.

"So, let's begin, shall we?" She smiled as she sat down. "My name is Stacey Helen. I wrote this shortly after I woke up from my coma. I think it's a fun story! It's got magic and friends and as always, a good lesson to go by so your parents would be very happy!" She winked at them as they giggled. "I read this last week. Do we remember what we were talking about?"

A little girl raised her hand. "About what it's like to be you."

"Exactly. Why do you think this is important?"

"Cause we wanna be rich and famous?" A little boy called out.

"A ha! Nice try, Brad but not quite. Let me tell you what I learned from this. This came to me in a dream. Do you know what a dream is?"

"The pictures we get when we fall asleep?" The little girl said timidly.

"Uh huh. And sometimes we get nightmares, huh?" Stacey smiled warmly. "But it's all right to be scared sometimes because of these nightmares. What's really important about dreams is that with dreams, we can make anything."

"For example," She grinned as she held up the book. "I dreamt this up!"

"So if I wanna be a astronaut, can I be that?" A little boy asked suddenly.

"You can be anything you want to be! My mama even said I could be Sailor Moon! Do you know who she is?"

"No..." Came the chorus and she grinned wider.

"Guess that was just in my time. Well, she was a superhero who beat up bad guys and saved the day! She was my inspiration, in fact."

"So your mama said you could be Sailor Moon?!" A little girl blinked in surprise. "But we can't be superheroes!"

"Not with magical powers, no. But we got something else in us," She tapped her head. "We can dream. We create things every day. Cures, stories, hope, these are all from our dreams. Sometimes we won't know what we dream but that's because we're not ready to let everyone see our dreams. But when you're ready, when you want to show people your dreams, then you'll realize, hey, I did something great without being a superhero, without being overly important."

She noted the children and their faces of boredom. "Here, let me say it another way. If you want to be a astronaut, go for it! Go see the stars, learn about them, fly with them! And when you think you're ready to show everyone your dreams of flying up in space, don't listen to those that laugh, listen to those who tell you to go for it!"

"You can be a somebody any old day. You can pretend to be a hero, to be a warrior of truth and justice but to be to a special somebody, you have to look deep within you and find out what you dream about. Who here has a dream?"

Several hands shot up. "Go ahead, yell it out."

"I wanna be a nurse!"

"I wanna see the ocean!"

"I want to learn how to dance!"

"I'd like to find Mr. Right!"

The girls all agreed on that one.

"I'd certainly like to see that dream!" Stacey laughed. "But see, we all have dreams but you know what we'd need to do? Believe in them. Make them into reality. Now, that probably means more school.."

"BOO!!"

"You'll change your mind," she pointed out.

"BOO!!"

"Or not.." She chuckled. "Or sometimes, all we have to do is reach out to others. It can be your family, your parents, you siblings. Even to friends. We are all dreamers in this world. Where would we be without it? We'd be like animals! We wouldn't have all the great things we have today!"

She looked up and noted the time. "I'm sorry guys if I bored you! But I get so excited talking about dreams, it's just a great subject for me. Next week, we'll discuss more on your own dreams. How does that sound?"

"Yea!"

"Have a good day, guys!" She watched them pile up. "Remember, there's a volunteer here for helping out with the library."

She smiled as she held up her book, the picture of Morpheus looking at her. And the ring glittered on the page as she sighed and held it close to her.

"Excuse me, Miss?" A young man had stood up from the desk.

She smiled at him. "How could I be of assistance, sir?"

"I was reading your story, actually. A friend of mine got it for me, as a joke. Said I reminded him of that ...what's its name? Baku?"

She blinked innocently as she studied him. "Hm... You do have the same eyes. If you dyed your hair pink..."

"Oh, no, no..." He grinned. "We won't be doing anything LIKE that."

"But ahem..." He coughed. "I was ...err, wondering if I could get your autograph. Rumor has it you have more books coming out and well, I thought I'd take this moment before you got totally famous."

"What? Oh, I'm not going to be famous. I'd love more than anything to be a novelist...but there's another more important dream out there for me."

"Really? What?" He stood in front of her and she smiled at him.

"Simple. I want to teach. I want to show children that they can dream and they don't have to be afraid to do so. I've made it my superpower, if you will.."

"Damn, I thought it might be about finding Mr. Right." He grinned.

"Yea, well, that'd be nice too." They began to walk out of the room. "Well, is that your dream?"

"Yea... it'd be nice...Oh, but I also kinda ..err... wanna... "

"Come on, spill it!"

"I'd like to be a farmer," He scratched his nose. "I like farm animals, especially pigs.. I mean, they're so great."

"You should try a pot-bellied pig! They're adorable!"

"I need a farm first," He smiled.

"Well, what are you doing about it?"

"Oh, me? I've been saving a few years now and I've got the perfect place... but... well.. today's so modern. I probably should stick with being a contractor."

"Nonsense!" She whapped him along the shoulders. "Go for it! Buy it! If you need help, I'll be glad to offer a hand!"

She pressed a card in his shirt pocket. "Just give me a ring, why don't you? Oh... I didn't get your name!"

"Drew... Drew Andrews."

"Stacey Helen but you probably knew that," She grinned. "Call me!"

"Wait!" He came up to her side. "Wait.. I, err, kind of wanted to apologize."

"What?" She stopped.

"You don't remember me, do you?"

It took a moment to remember that one boy who had tried his hardest to break her spirit. It had been before that accident. "Hey... you're that eighth grader! I was, what, in..."

"Fourth grade. Yea... umm... I remembered you from the name only," He reached out slowly. "After you left school for a while, I thought I made you disappear. That really made me change. All I could do was remember how mean I was to everyone and I decided to change..."

"Because... of me?"

"Yea..." He was actually blushing. "You... were really important for me...I never got to know you then. I was too stupid... But... I'd still like to, that is, if you'll forgive me?"

"I forgave the world when I woke up from my coma," She said with smile. "But you know, if you really wanna make it up to me, how about dinner?"

"That'd be great. My treat though," And he offered his arm.

And for a moment, she imagined something. It'd someday be real, that's for sure. And she walked down that altar, Drew smiling happily.

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'All I ever wanted to be was somebody. I thought I could be that in my dreams but I wasn't living. I was trapped instead. But the world's not as cold as I had thought. There are people who are mean, who are cruel but there are those, closer, who look upon me with love and hope. And I want to do the same. I won't lock myself in like I wasn't worthy of the world. Even if it's as silly as being a superhero, I'll tell myself, I tell everyone go for it. To dream is to be human. To make that dream makes you a somebody'  
'This time, I won't just dream about life, I'll make life my reality. After all, I'm the Dream Shaper...' 


End file.
